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Archive for November, 2012

The More They Recount, The More Things Stay . . .

The recount of District 2 votes for Buncombe County Commissioner finished early, but that doesn’t mean anything. Mike Fryar had 19,991 votes; Ellen Frost, 19,903; Christina Kelly G. Merrill, 19,886; and Carol Weir Peterson, 19,868. The top two vote-getters will be seated on the board, but third-place Merrill has asked for a manual recount. If the results from counting votes in three randomly-selected districts varies significantly from the machine tallies, all ballots will be recounted. Whoever gets the second seat will be sworn in late. Merrill is also challenging the dismissal of her protest alleging proper procedures were not followed in dealing with the Warren Wilson College mixup.

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This Does Not Compute

Illegal workers stressed beyond allowable limits of labor laws were still making the best food in town.

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How Many Glass Beads Would That Be?

Friday is the big day the Metropolitan Sewerage District was going to reveal to the public the findings of the consulting firm it hired to study a merger with the City of Asheville’s water system. Critics who have already seen the report complained it made no mention of compensating the city for acres upon acres of pristine watershed. Tuesday, an offer of $57 million surfaced.

The report also goes against modern grains to imply it is good to destroy jobs:

A study recently done for the utility by a consulting firm found that savings from a merger would range from $10.3 million to $21.9 million through 2022, depending on how aggressively MSD reduces the number of workers for a combined entity.

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Junior! Close That Math Book and Party!

Horizons have just expanded for those dejected in search of intelligence, finding only opportunities to learn about Marxism, atheism, feminism, and bad art at institutes of higher learning. Joining other WNC colleges, AB Tech announced it, too, will teach vice. In the past months, other colleges have created booze and gambling curricula. Northern California’s Humbolt State University announced two days ago the creation of a pot curriculum.

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One of Three Will Keep the Hairdresser Appointment

Christina Kelly G. Merrill’s protest of the recent county commissioner contest was rejected. In a very close race, Merrill claimed procedures for verifying addresses were not strictly followed. In particular, she wanted to discard votes cast in the mess-up at the left-leaning, gerrymander-severed Warren Wilson College. Legal counsel for contender Ellen Frost asked if the people wanted leadership that wanted to throw out their votes. Merrill intends to appeal the decision.

Meanwhile, the recount is underway, and it should be complete by Friday. The new commissioners will be sworn in the following Tuesday.

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No Market for Common Food

Lowe’s Foods is closing the south Asheville store it opened only six months ago. Common taters blame a marketing failure: a bourgeoise store was built in a wealthy part of town. So, riddle me this: If rich people are too rich to buy ordinary food, and poor people are too poor to even buy food (Half the kids in several schools are on the Free or Reduced program for lunch and breakfast.), where’s the middle class?

On the bright side, there is now greater opportunity to create jobs. 55 Lowe’s workers will join the ranks of the unemployed.

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All Symbols Are Not Equal

The following is, by definition, ignorant:

Whether is politically correct, Buncombe County’s plugging of the AIDS Quilt on its web site, or Bryson City’s approval of a nativity display downtown? Certain populations find Christianity offensive, and certain Christians find AIDS offensive. Many people have died of AIDS and Christianity; the former, by biological causes; the latter, intolerance. AIDS people want to expedite a medical cure, Christian people seek spiritual healing.

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Stroke! Stroke!

Recently, Asheville City Council approved a rickshaw service for downtown. Tonight, Councilman Cecil Bothwell mentioned plans in the works to approve a twelve-man pedal bus. A driver would steer and brake, and the passengers would pedal and consume alcohol. An onboard motor would be available in case the drunks couldn’t get it together. The contraption is perfectly legal.

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All Washed Up

The Asheville Water Disagreement continues to make headlines, although little new seems to be announced. Even the photos are recycled. The latest publication claims Hendersonville was not interested in the regional authority. It just happened that they needed help with their XXXXy sewage system at the same time. Folks at the Metropolitan Sewerage District, which will likely control water and sewer for Asheville and Hendersonville, gave a different impression almost a year ago.

Legislators are now drafting bills to require a merger of Asheville’s water system and the MSD. They are expected to be rammed through the General Assembly ASAP.

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Because It’s Walmart

Reporters and newsmakers are still getting back into the swing following the four-day weekend. Since there is no news, we can emphasize the crimes that occurred at Walmarts on Black Friday (1, 2, 3). We will then, without consideration of how many crimes occurred per capita in other retail outlets, use the data to show Walmart should either unionize or at least stop running at a profit.

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November 2012
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